There are times, like now, when I feel this overwhelming sense of panic overtake me. I may seem like I have it all together, but the fact of the matter is that I have no idea what I'm doing; I'm just as lost as the next guy.

I'm here alone watching TV. The kiddos are all snuggled into their beds, and I just went to check on them. As I was stroking Roo's cheek and whispering another Goodnight to her, I suddenly heard a voice plain as day saying, "What are you doing?!"  I began to get that tightening feeling in my chest and my feet got cold, and I thought to myself, "What ARE you doing?!"

Am I doing a disservice to my family again? Was leaving my job without another prospect a huge mistake? Am I putting the very people I love the most in an impossible situation? Did I fool myself into thinking that this dream I pursued was for my whole family yet was truly a selfish thing for myself?

I was feeling so brave and sure of myself! I was proud of having such trust in the Universe and amazed at the unwavering Faith I had that everything was going to work out and be the way it was supposed to be... However, maybe I was getting a bit too full of myself. Perhaps in reaching so far I managed to push everything away, rather than pull it all towards me...