My desktop computer just crashed. I can't get it to work now, and I'm frantic! I have all my pictures and all my school work on there!!! I'm an IDIOT because I haven't backed up anything for about 4 months, so that means all that stuff is going to be GONE!

My final, my pictures... Oh man, I can't believe it!

I'm 2 days further behind than I wanted to be, and tomorrow I'm gone all night for the Eclipse premiere.

SUX!

I've been neglecting my poor blog, but it's all for a good cause; I'm almost done with my certificate! I have only the final left to complete, and then I'm ready to start searching for jobs. I'm terrified, and my biggest problem is that I'm not sure exactly what I want to do and when I want to do it. I really wanted a relaxed schedule were I could "pick and choose" when I was going to work, but the more I investigate it doesn't seem like that's going to be a reality for a while. I don't mind working to get to that point, but I'm just not sure how I want to arrange my time to suit my family best.

Blah.

I got a very nice email from Ian's teacher this morning asking if I got a call from the principal and saying how "saddened" she was about this whole thing and with Ian not being in school today. Apparently she had a discussion with the principal the morning she got the letter, and she's been upset ever since. I replied to her email and told her that I hadn't heard yet, and again told her that I was in no way angry, but rather concerned about the message we're sending our children.

Then I got a call saying Ian had an "unexcused absence" from school. That just made me laugh!

About 30 minutes ago the phone rang and it was the principal. I can honestly say that, after talking to her for about 15 minutes, I am blown away by the response I got. She let me say my piece, then told me how the award used to be called something else and it was actually a "county-wide" change to Citizenship Award a few years ago. She admitted they had never considered how the verbiage may be viewed, and said she totally understood my point. She understood my concern that the younger kids may have a hard time with such an abstract concept, and she also told me that Ian's teacher spent a good deal of time yesterday speaking to him and assuring him that he is a "good citizen" in every sense of the word. She started to say how Ian's situation was so individual that she wasn't really sure how to address it, but I cut her off to tell her that I did not write the letter for Ian, but rather for ALL the young kids who may be confused by the message they received.

In the end, she told me she's going to bring the issue up at the school's planning meeting on Friday and they are actually going to vote on changing the name of the award. She will let me know next week on their finding.

I am SO happy. Even if they don't change the name, at least I know that fought for what I believe in! I hope Ian learns a good lesson from this, even if it takes a while for him to understand it fully.

I drafted a letter last night that I plan to send to Ian's teacher, the Principal, and the President of the PTA. I know it will probably go unnoticed, but I am hoping that it might give them something to think about in the future.

"When my kindergarten-aged son was not chosen for a Citizenship Award I was not only saddened but also confused.  This is the same child who was recognized at the beginning of the year for his ability to comfort other children, who took time to help his classmates when they didn't understand something, and who stood up to other children when he felt they were being unfair or mistreating others.  He went almost 5 months with very few incidents of behavior issues, and it wasn't until February that there were any problems which, as we all know, stemmed from a specific situation. Since that time he has tried very hard to produce the behaviors necessary for success in the classroom, and there has been steady improvement which is evidenced by the behavior chart he brings home every day. He was also very, very proud of the volunteer work he did during Campus Beautification Day.    

 

He was devastated that he didn't "earn" an invitation to the Citizenship Award event, and unfortunately I didn't have a reason to give him as to why he wasn't included.  I tried explaining to him that he doesn't need an award or a medal to prove he's a success, but to his 6-year-old mind he couldn't get past the fact that he was one of only a few children excluded.  To add to this, he was very aware that other children who also had chronic behavior issues were given Citizenship Awards.

 

I can only imagine what he was thinking when he realized he wasn't going to be included in this event.  He was so proud of the improvement he made toward the end of this year, and he was especially conscious of how people viewed him at the beginning of this year.   To have his past success and his recent improvement and accomplishments unrecognized is incredibly hurtful, and I am disappointed that the administration would fail to encourage him and any other child who has worked hard or shown improvement by excluding them from an event that they are very much aware of.     

 

I am in no way writing this letter in hopes that my son receives an award this year, nor am I writing it to diminish the accomplishments of the other children who work so hard year-round.  My only wish is to communicate "the other side of the story" from parents who have children who are attempting to overcome adverse situations or that may be struggling due to the adjustment of being in a school setting.  I honestly feel that at 6 years old the meaning behind being a "good citizen" should be encompassing more than what it appears to be. " 

The pen being mightier than the sword, I thought I'd go this route rather than go into his classroom on Monday.

Ian's last day of school is Thursday.

When he started Kindergarten, we had a "group meeting" with his teacher (with all the other parents at the beginning of the school year). At that meeting we were told about the Citizenship Awards at the end of the year when the kids get medals. We were told that, basically, if a child does his homework weekly and doesn't have any major issues, they'll be getting one (meaning that 99.9% of the Kindergartners get them, I'm thinking).

When we had our first parent-teacher conference we were told how wonderful Ian was, how smart and caring he was, how she wished every kid could be like him, how he took the "less popular" kids under his wing and made sure they were treated well, blah blah blah. Well. We all know how the second conference went, right? The one after all the stuff with the After School Program happened? Throughout it all we kept the teacher informed about all the crap going on, our suspicions, what we've been doing to fix his behavior, our expectations, etc, and she even had discussions with us about another little boy in the class who went to the same program and how "scary" his behavior had gotten... Anyway, Ian got one check on his report card last grading period because of his behavior, but that's it. We went to the principal's office after that to discuss our suspicions about why he was acting the way he was, told her we wanted help, on and on. We were even told about this other little's boy's behavior and how horrible it was too, so they were aware of the after school program and it's affects... After that meeting we saw a MAJOR improvement in Ian's behavior. Maybe 1 or 2 reds with a yellow thrown in here and there. The rest were green. He's been working SO HARD at behaving...

Today I find out he isn't getting an award. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! Seriously? Not only that, but the teacher handed out the "golden piece of paper" to each child who was getting an award in front of all the other kids (um, meaning mine) who didn't get "picked". AND, on top of THAT, the other little boy is getting one, but Ian isn't. Seriously? Now, I'm not saying that this other little boy doesn't deserve it, and I'm definitely not saying that kids shouldn't learn that behavior has consequences, but really? At 6 you're going to do this to them? After his working so hard to improve? What the hell does that teach them? They can't even go to the ceremony, so that means that Ian will be sitting in the classroom while the rest of them go and get snow-cones and awards? Really?

I am just sick over it. Part of me wants to keep him home on Tuesday and take the day off of work, but another part of me understands the important lesson behind all of this...

Thoughts?