I'm loving life today. Work passed in a whirlwind of speed due to a Baker Act and a meeting at the jail, and now I'm home playing with one of my favorite guys. I cleaned out and filled his water table, so instead of sitting inside watching TV or something, he's making his rubber Great White Shark eat his rubber Humpback Whale. Interesting narration going on too: I actually heard him say, "Don't worry, Humpback Whale, this won't hurt," as he had the shark gnaw it's face, and "Sorry, Shark," as he started biting the shark's face...

I was pissed off this morning over something stupid I learned, but I was 'talked down' by my friend this morning. I'm glad I was able to get over myself quickly because the last thing I need in my life is drama and people's asinine responses to my thoughts! Because I felt somewhat ashamed of my quick reaction to what I had seen, I decided to spend lunch at the bagel place by myself creating the "commandments" our Church is doing this month (see our Soul Searching Sisters blog for more information if you're interested).

I was amazed at how easy it was to let go of my anger in only a few hours! I used to hold on to my negative emotions forever, but I'm learing how to find and focus on the good and important parts of situations. It's been a long road to get here and I'm not even close to being at the end of my journey, but I'm in a much better place than I was even a year ago. I don't know if it's the people I have in my life now, the fact that I've found a religion that makes me feel more 'whole' than I ever have before, or the amazing situations I've found myself having to deal with which have shown me an inner strength I never knew existed,  but I wouldn't change one thing. I am a far better person now than I ever was, and all the heartache I've had in the past year, in all aspects of my life, has helped to shape the person I am now.

I spoke to a long time friend of mine yesterday, and it was like the past came back to me for a while. We spoke about all the crazy things we did and tried to figure out why we survived when so many don't. I've known this woman since I was in the fourth grade so I really did grow up with her... It was amazing to talk about "then" and to turn around and catch up on "now" because it's shown me how far I've really come in my life. From the messed up kid who broke into the school, let all of the animals loose in the science lab, punctured tires, drank every chance I got, I now find myself a pretty good wife and mother. I'm a woman with solid friendships created with time and trust, someone who would fight to the end for justice and truth for her friends and family, a person who doesn't need deception and cruelty to make themselves feel better than others... I know it's taken me 30 years to get here, but now that I've started I can't wait to see what the next 30 years bring!