Looks like Reilly won't be able to come home right now. I can't believe that, once again, I'm getting discharged without my baby!!!!

She was looking yellow to me yesterday but everyone told me I was paranoid... Well, they did her billi levels this morning and they're 19.4 so she's going to have to stay. Of course if it was going to be anything, this is what I'd want to have to deal with, but COME ON!!!! I'm frustrated that I'm going to have to supplement with formula (which is of course not a big deal, but I was excited to be able to exclusively breast feed her after the fiasco with Ian in the NICU, and that this was probably caused by me having O- blood and she having A+. Once again my body has to screw something up!!!!

I can't stop crying. My cell phone is dead so I can't even get anyone's number off of it so I can vent to my friends.

And I feel guilty about poor Ian. I called Sean a little bit ago to tell him to come down here since the Pediatrician is going to explain what all this means, and my mom didn't answer her phone when I called to ask if she'd go over there to sit with him. Sean called a family friend and she's going over, but Ian's asleep. This means that he's going to wake up and Daddy is going to be gone and he won't even have the comfort of my mom. It was bad enough on Friday when he was thinking that I was going to die... He isn't going to understand what happened!

My poor little boy is going to need therapy.