I have been in both worlds now: The Stay at Home Mom world and the Full Time Working Mom world. Both were tough in their own right. They both have stress, both have drama, and yet both fulfill you. Both make you angry, both make you feel unappreciated at times, and both can make you want to be in the "other" world sometimes.

Being new at this SAHM thing I was unprepared for what has happened in (or, to?) my life. I naively thought that I would be home in the morning sipping my coffee and watching the news before Ian got up. When I heard the pitter-patter of little feet I'd start cooking him a nutritious breakfast, then we'd sit down together and eat. After that was done I'd get him ready for school, pack his lunch, and off we'd go for a half-hour drive full of laughter and talking. While he was at school I thought I'd meet with friends, then come home and do some housework, perhaps run an errand or two. Then I'd go pick up my smiling angel from school and, when we returned home, we'd play together until it was time for me to make dinner. I'd cook a wonderful meal for my family and it would be ready when Sean came home from work. We'd sit at the table and eat together, laughing about the days events. After dinner we'd clean up, play a board game or read a book, then Ian would toddle off  to bed. Sean and I would snuggle on the couch for an hour or two, then we'd head off to bed together, secure in our new found marital bliss.

HA! Wow, what a dream world I was living in!

I don't have ONE SPARE moment to even do a load of laundry! I spend the better part of my life driving back and forth to Ian's school which, when I did the math, is 40 miles a day. I drive to appointments and sit for hours so that someone who has a job and is making an actual paycheck can tell me that I either have to make another appointment, have to pay them money, or that I was an idiot for making this appointment in the first place (OK, that isn't true. Usually they're productive, but I'm bitter right now so this is what you get). I am making my soap so there's a few hours lost there too, and then there's the actual housework that's mandatory, like putting the dishes in the dishwasher and taking out the trash. If I'm lucky I get to talk on the phone, but that's only because it's a cordless so I can take the same moment I'm talking to pee. Sorry for the disillusionment, but it's true.

So, what does this mean? Nothing, except that this is much harder than I thought. It isn't all TV and bon-bons (though if I decide to let my house fall apart and get 3 loads of laundry behind, I can actually watch a movie during the day), love and kisses, or happy playtime. There is a lot of work to be done and a lot more responsibility being a SAHM than I ever realized. I'm not sure if I'm adult enough to handle it all!